Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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