thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Randomize
