So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
