A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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