I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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