You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Are we still banned from the library?
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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