All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
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