Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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