Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
