You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
