There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
