Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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