chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
