I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
