idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
