he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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