so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
So much rum. So many feels.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
