blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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