So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Randomize
