he puts the penis in happiness.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
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