i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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