he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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