the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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