This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
