he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
