she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
