Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
