dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
