Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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