I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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