Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
