Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
"it" just moved
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
