Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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