I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
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