Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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