I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
