I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
