i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
