dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Randomize
