Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Randomize
