You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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