You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
