If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
don't judge my taste in strippers
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
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