3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
