Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I think we might need a safe word for this...
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
