I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
