I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
