Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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