My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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