I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
